"someone who has nothing better to do"How is everybody?
How is everybody? How are my friends in church? How are my Dgroupmates? How is IV-Prudence 06-07? How are my old classmates doing in 2nd sem? How are my cousins? How are all of my friends?
For the past month since sembreak, I know that I have been aloof with almost everyone except for my family. I don't talk to people in school, heck, I didn't even join an organization because I don't feel like it! It's not that I'm an antisocial or anything, but the thought that I'm going to go through a lot of hassles during the application process, line in line with my acads is just too much for me. I want to study and I want to have good grades, and I still can't shake this feeling that joining an org would ruin my academic standing as of now. Or maybe because I've been there and done that. I was Student Council president in high school, I've joined theater clubs, ministry, etc. I felt like I needed to escape from the scene for a while. Maybe I just needed a time out. I think I deserve it.
Anyways, that's not the point. Honestly this is the first time I've ever felt this. The kind of attitude not caring about anyone around me, not minding what they would think or say, as long as I should do what I do and I succeed with it. What's happening to me? And nothing seems to affect me anymore, not like what I used to be in high school or maybe even just a couple of months ago.
I used to be a highly-sensitive person who always minded people's perceptions about me. But recently, this attitude seems to disappear in my system. What's weird is, I feel like I'm surviving right now without even a solid group of friends (or a barkada) to get along with me. I guess I'm a nerd in a kolehiyala's standards, but, I guess this is how it's going to happen. And is it wrong to not care? Because I don't care. I don't feel like I'm missing something in my life, because I know God would give it to me right then and there if it is indeed missing. I trust Him for everything. If God jumbles up my life into bits and pieces I can't comprehend, then it still does not matter. He caused it. And even though it shall be a worst case scenario, I have faith that something good, something wonderful, something praiseworthy will prevail. =)
For the past month since sembreak, I know that I have been aloof with almost everyone except for my family. I don't talk to people in school, heck, I didn't even join an organization because I don't feel like it! It's not that I'm an antisocial or anything, but the thought that I'm going to go through a lot of hassles during the application process, line in line with my acads is just too much for me. I want to study and I want to have good grades, and I still can't shake this feeling that joining an org would ruin my academic standing as of now. Or maybe because I've been there and done that. I was Student Council president in high school, I've joined theater clubs, ministry, etc. I felt like I needed to escape from the scene for a while. Maybe I just needed a time out. I think I deserve it.
Anyways, that's not the point. Honestly this is the first time I've ever felt this. The kind of attitude not caring about anyone around me, not minding what they would think or say, as long as I should do what I do and I succeed with it. What's happening to me? And nothing seems to affect me anymore, not like what I used to be in high school or maybe even just a couple of months ago.
I used to be a highly-sensitive person who always minded people's perceptions about me. But recently, this attitude seems to disappear in my system. What's weird is, I feel like I'm surviving right now without even a solid group of friends (or a barkada) to get along with me. I guess I'm a nerd in a kolehiyala's standards, but, I guess this is how it's going to happen. And is it wrong to not care? Because I don't care. I don't feel like I'm missing something in my life, because I know God would give it to me right then and there if it is indeed missing. I trust Him for everything. If God jumbles up my life into bits and pieces I can't comprehend, then it still does not matter. He caused it. And even though it shall be a worst case scenario, I have faith that something good, something wonderful, something praiseworthy will prevail. =)
posted by Unknown at 10:20 PM
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